Reset Your Life Day 7: Write Your Ideal Life Narrative

This post is Day 7 of the 31 Days to Reset Your Life Challenge. Learn more and sign up for the program here.

One of the most powerful ways to get clear about your goals and dreams is to visualize them. It can be incredibly motivating and inspiring to really be able to see your desired path in your mind’s eye, to go to sleep dreaming about it and wake up thinking about it. Yesterday, you started to do a bit of visualizing on paper by creating a life map. Today, we’re going to take that exercise further and get even more specific in your visual by imagining what your ideal life would really look like once you put it all together. Today, you are going to write your ideal life narrative.

Day 7: Write Your Ideal Life Narrative

Your ideal life narrative is basically you telling a story about the life you want for yourself. It answers questions like:

  • What are you doing on a daily basis in your ideal life?
  • Who are you spending your time with?
  • How are you earning your living?
  • Where are you living?
  • How are you spending your leisure time?

The only requirement to this exercise is that you use nothing but present tense statements. You should say “I am” or “I have” to indicate that you are already living your ideal life. To complete this exercise, you will incorporate your goals, hopes and dreams from your life map using these seven specific areas of your life:

  • Lifestyle
  • Work
  • Education
  • Finances
  • Health
  • Family
  • Relationships

To express your response to this exercise, you should take a fresh look at your life map and write out in paragraph form exactly what your life would look like with all seven areas combined. You should be as specific as possible – you want to paint an inspiring mental picture with your narrative.

As an example, I share my ideal life narrative below.

Rosetta’s Ideal Life Narrative

I am living in Washington, DC, though I spend half the year traveling. I have a large, luxury apartment in the city with a huge gourmet kitchen. Every month, I entertain various groups of friends with themed dinner parties and fundraising brunches. I spend the summer in Paris and the winter in Hawaii and Jamaica. I am a highly sought-after speaker for national and international conferences and conventions. I also have my own popular annual event where I bring together women of color from around the world for professional development and personal transformation. I have published several bestselling books and they have been translated in over a dozen languages. I earn a million-dollar income doing what I love – empowering people to find their purpose and live out their dreams. I have access to a private jet and a personal driver. I have close relationships with my immediate family. I visit my extended family several times a year to celebrate holidays, birthdays and sometimes “just because.” I have a handsome, loving partner who supports me in my goals and allows me to support him in his. I am healthy both physically and mentally. I exercise daily and have a good therapist who helps me grow and thrive. I am a lifelong learner and I invest in my ongoing education by attending seminars and reading at least one book a month. I also take cooking, writing and dance classes to feed my creativity. I meditate every morning to connect to the God in me. As a result, I spread as much love as possible on the streets of my journey. Every year, I give away at least 10% of my income to charity and I volunteer on a regular basis.

When you’re done, please share your “ideal life narrative” with us in the comments! Would also be great to hear how you felt as you completed this exercise. Did it excite you? Did it clarify your life map?

Note: If you blogged about today’s assignment, please post the link in the comments so we can read it!
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89 comments

  1. Pingback: Day 12: Create a Vision Board « Epiphanies Manifest Truths (emt)

  2. This was thrilling! It’s so great to *write down* what your ideal life looks like … and a little scary, to be honest. There is an instantaneous whisper of: “how dare you dream so big?” “haha – yeah right!” … especially because my current real life is quite a ways away from my ideal.

    In either case, I realize that all I can do is work towards my dreams and see which/how God chooses to bless them. Here goes:

    I own a brownstone in a vibrant, multicultural neighborhood in NYC, where I know and spend time with my neighbors, both the tenants who rent from me and those in the broader community. These individuals are singles, couples, and families with whom I “party,” go to church, volunteer, etc. Along with friends I’ve made performing over the years, old friends (i.e. from college), and newer friends from my social club and elsewhere, they serve as a mutually uplifting extended family.

    As for my immediate family, they visit me and my wonderful husband (at least) seasonally; and he and I split holidays between our families. (Sometimes we host holiday gatherings with our immediate and extended families.) In general, I have healthy, fun, mutually supportive friendships with my parents and my successful siblings, who, like me, have found a way to make an excellent living doing what they love and built healthy, happy families of their own.

    I am a prolific, renowned actress, writer, director and producer, with NY Times bestsellers and Oscars under my belt. I split my winters between London and LA – where we have homes and I work much of the year. My husband and I have travelled everywhere we both wanted to go all of our lives at least once. At this point, when we travel abroad, we feel a bit like locals, due, in part, to our global friendships.

    Worship and fellowship contribute to my spiritual health while a regular exercise regimen (including ballroom dancing classes!) and healthy diet help keep me fit and fly. I stimulate my mind reading for fun and taking in as much culture as possible wherever I am, especially in NYC and London and on my travels. I also continue to read, take classes, seek tutorials from, and network with knowledgeable friends regarding developments in my industry – in which I’m also a sought after expert.

    A billionaire, I have accumulated the financial wealth that I dreamed of and worked to cultivate. Having come to a place in my life where I feel holistically healthy and fulfilled, I am now, more than ever, strongly considering motherhood. I regularly donate money and time to charity – but it would be great to pass a portion of my wealth on to a biological (and/or possibly adopted) daughter(s) and/or son(s).

  4. I was a bit unsure at first but the thoughts just started flowing:
    I am a hard-working mother and a dedicated wife. I have a strong mind and love to express my opinion. I live in Los Angeles with my wonderful husband and kids. I am still a Lead Pharmacy Technician with a background in Medical Billling/Coding. I have children who are learning every day how to be strong & open-minded individuals. I teach them how to grow and be independant and respect others as well as themselves. Each month I plan outings with my husband, my kids, and my friends to keep me enjoying life to the max. I speak to my family very often by texting, brief calls, and through Facebook. I have a husband who trusts and believes in me. I feed my creative mind by reading books monthly to escape the real world for a while. I pray daily and teach my kids to do the same. I play games and go to the park and run around just to feel free and not trapped in a corporate world. I continue to learn from my mistakes and move only forward, not dwelling on the past.

    After writing this I’ve realized I really just want to spend more of my time with my kids and family. Good luck to you all with fulfilling your “true life” !

  5. Writing my narrative made me feel jealous. I so want that life! This was the most difficult exercise. It actually took me 4 days to finish it. I was a little intimadated when I started my first draft. When I put it down for a few days, I was able to just let the writing flow

  6. Day 7-Life Narrative
    I am twenty something years old and married to the love of my life. My daughter is now a little older and excelling in dance and soccer and of course, school. She is a Principal’s List student. While very well-rounded and an overall happy child, she is also very curious, which sometimes gets her into trouble. But, she’s a child and her curiosity will serve her well throughout her life. She still wants to be a doctor. My husband, who is a business owner and highly sought after consultant, is very attentive to my every need and want. He supports me in my endeavors, as I do him, and accepts me for the woman I am and who I am on a journey to becoming. We have date night at least once a week, which must include leaving the house. We frequent restaurants and attend movies, plays or art/music events. We live in a large, well-kept apartment, condo, or townhome. We have 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, W/D connections, dishwasher, and double sinks. Our cleaning person comes once a week to keep the place looking snazzy and smelling good. We eat breakfast and dinner as a family and only work through the week. Speaking of jobs, I absolutely love my position as a Program/Executive Director/Founder of a community center, where we focus on the family as a whole. Programming includes: Women’s Support, tutoring, interviewing/job hunting/resume building skills and finance classes to name a few. I also consult as a side hustle in child abuse/neglect cases. In addition, I also provide trainings, workshops, etc. I also work with the homeless on a volunteer basis. While my work life is hectic but loved, I have the perfect balance of work and family. I call my mother at least 3 times a week, my aunt once a month and my dad a least twice a month. I work out at least 4 times a week and my health has never been better. I am a healthy 190-210lbs and I carry it well. Fruits and vegetables have been incorporated into my daily meals and it’s not a chore. I love them! I take my multi-vitamins every day and my husband and I enjoy a healthy sex life. I also attend all annual exams and checkups and take care of any issues when they first appear. The same is true for my daughter. I am done with school, as I have my Master’s degree, but continue my education through reading, workshops, CEUs and trainings. I am also contemplating returning to school to receive my doctoral degree, but that is an idea for the near future. Not right now. My family is financially secure with both my husband and I netting $120,000 annually. We have abundant savings accounts with at least $250,000 jointly, as well as separate savings accounts. My separate account currently stands at $75,000 and growing. We make informed and smart financial decisions and invest with a keen eye. Because I am grounded in my spirituality and relationship with God, all others things fall in place.
    I am happy.

  7. IDEAL LIFE NARRATIVE (this is an ideal day in my ideal life, hence me being so specific in certain things)

    I wake up at 8.30 am in my stylishily decorated (by me!) 2 bedroom apartment somewhere leafy in Sydenham (or area of equal niceness(!), possibly Greenwich). I love that i can get up at a luxurious 8.30 instead of at the crack of dawn like i used to!

    I am greeted by my 2 charteux kittens, Tabatha and Smokey. I go into my open plan kitchen to make breakfast flicking on my large flat screen TV on the way.

    I make breakfast and eat it on the floor of my spaciaous living room while watching tv (coz i’m grown and its my place and i can dammit!) I then go to my walk in closet (2nd bedroom) and select a quirky joe browns outfit for the day. I then take a nice long power shower in my walk in shower. My bathroom also has one of those clawfooted bath tubs i like. My bathroom is fully stocked with soap and glory products (coz i love ‘em!)

    I get a text from one of my best friends confirming that we are having luch late to talk about a trip we are all going on.

    i run down to my convertible bug (new model) and drive to work at my private tuition company. I own and run successful franchises of it all over south east london.

    i started out small, but expanded to include children whose parents have taken them out of school part time to catch up. i drive to my small premises and work with a small group of lovely children who are polite appreciative and want to learn.

    I work form 10-12, then 2-4 then 5-7. i love that i can have a 2 hour lunch break and work in short bursts of 2 hours 3 times a day. The time always goes quickly. I am home by 7.30pm and all my planning, prep work and assessments are done on weekends and in school holidays. I sometimes work through lunch too, but i don’t mind this.

    5-7pm i have the option of working from home giving one to one tuition. Only select children get to come to my home for this.

    I am looking forward to going on a holiday with friends to New York (or some other fabulous destination!) and we meet up at lunch time to discuss/plan it.

    I have 3 close friends. we are all of a similar age and background. They understand and accept me and i can be who i am (which is the goofy, funny one!) They admire (and envy!) my bravery in successfully setting up my own business.

    Thanks to the success of my tuition company, i am debt free and have a healthy savings account. I earn enough to pay all my bills and rent/mortgage with enough left over to live my life (holidays etc)

    I love that i have personal freedom. i am not answerable to a boss (except me, but i’m soft!) and i have no colleagues to worry about and the children i work with are hard working with good attitudes and making good progress because i am good at what i do. parents are nice and appreciative. My franchises across south east london are all also doing well. The sun always shines, even on a cloudy day :0)

    I want to be living this life NOW!!! waaaaahhhh!!!

    • I love your narrative. It is so vivid. I think that if you see yourself living this life it can be like what you have written. I can imagine you living this life and loving it to the fullest. Stay focused and never give up on your dreams.

    • Great job! I love that you were so specific. I struggle with being specific. I may do another narrative later and use your format. The working in 2-3 hour burst is great. Even though I’m at work from 8:30 to 5 (Mon-Fri), I usually work from 9 to 11:45, 1 to 3, & 4 to 5.

  8. Dorothy’s Ideal Life Narrative:
    I live on the island of (Barbados? – not sure exactly where the best location would be yet), where I own my own very small house with an art studio and enough land to grow a vegetable garden, fruit trees, and flowers. There is a strong sense of community where I live, and I am grateful to have several close friends who share my values, and we drop in to visit one another often. I have become expert at playing my kalimba and often get together informally with others who also play traditional instruments. I am semi-retired but earn at least $30,000 additional income each year from painting and textile design, which I sell worldwide via the internet. I am also working on completing the writing of two books and have a publisher interested in publishing both of them (one is a novel, the other is nonfiction). I visit Jamaica to attend symposiums and special events at the University of the West Indies at Mona. I visit Ethiopia and Russia to see places of interest and religious sites. I fly to the States to visit my children to celebrate holidays with them and to attend gatherings with members of my faith group. I support social justice and faith-related programs by giving at least 10% of my income to causes that I believe in, and I do volunteer work for those organizations. I have two pet cats. I am in excellent health, physically fit, and enjoy long walks.

  9. I am living in a fully furnished apartment/townhouse in an urban area;  it is decorated with rich earthy hues. I have obtained an advanced degree with a focus on education.  I am in a fully comitted relationship with a loving, supportive, educated, and handsome black man. I am loving him wholeheartedly.  I have transitioned into a career where I am allowed to be freely creative while sharing my life experiences with young women.  I am coming home from work happy and stress-free for I am living my life’s purpose.  I am debt-free and I have invested money to have for retirement.  I am eating well and exercising regularly.  I have forgiven my parents for the “misses” that I spent way too many years holding on to and praise their impact on my life and who I am. I am living out my bucket list and enjoying every minute of it.   I know that I am worthy of this good life.  I am truly happy.   

    This

    • I posted this before my Life Map (although it’s completed) because this was so very freeing for me. I didn’t think as I wrote, I just did. I was shocked to read a couple of thugs when I reviewed it but knew it was meant to be.

  10. Cliff’s Notes version:
    On a daily basis I am living a flexible life. I have time for daily exercise, yoga and meditation. I have a loyal, tight-knit group of friends who share my spiritual beliefs and understand me. We have fun taking trips together once or twice a year. My leisure time involves alone time to think and ponder; read at the bookstore, time with close girlfriends going for coffee or exercising or to festivals or the park, time to see shows, and travel. I am able to balance my leisure time between my husband, children and friends. I am living in a nice neighborhood…My house which I share with my husband is very nice and large. There is ample space for DD’s state-of-the-art playground set. My neighborhood is near several top notch schools that DD and her future sibling will attend in the years to come. I do work that I love on a daily basis. My work is in my niche. It allows me lots of flexibility. I can work from home, Skype in or go into the office. My staff is very professional and loyal. I bring in a 7 figure income doing the work that I love. It generates income even while I sleep. I am able to keep my work in a box and balance family time, me time, friends’ time etc. My education involves lifelong spiritual growth and evolution. I am debt free. I have an excellent credit score, a 3 tier fund (8 month emergency savings, IRA savings, regular savings and investments), and multiple streams of income through my lifelong work. I have excellent health incorporating exercise, yoga, and healthful eating into my daily life. I also get restful sleep each night. My nuclear family is tightly-knit. We have family traditions like game night and cruises. My husband and I make time to nurture our relationship through date nights and vacations. Our family unit is always solid and supportive.

  11. I am the owner of a successful business both at home and overseas. I started my buisness small from home, then expanded due to popularity after I completed my studies in this subject that I have always had an interest in. I live debt free and have savings for traveling even though its not required as i now get paid to travel for work also .My health has improved and i am comfortable with limitations as i worked through these, which in turn has increased my confidence. I am in a mutual respectful supportive partnership and enjoying spending time with loved ones. My child has grown into a loving young person and runs the business overseas with the family.

  12. I live a family-friendly community just outside a major city in Texas though I vacation twice per year between the US and Japan. It’s huge, spacious and bright. I’m married to a loving and supportive husband whom I prefer, esteem and support. We are indebted to God for our harmony, communication and family. I’m grateful, smiling and enjoying a green smoothie with my husband for breakfast while finalizing my schedule of appointments for the week before joining my sprinting group or heading to the gym. After my walk or workout, I finalize my schedule for the day then take a glance at the month ahead to confirm next city I’ll be in for an event. I get on the phone and make an appointment after whining trying to see why the newly opened boutique isn’t in Texas yet, how I’d have to fly out there until they’re selling their product online and request they notify me online the moment they do. I support and am supported by my family (and extended family) and friends. My sisters and I have the best time together whenever we gather. I am a best seller in the nation and my books are selling internationally. I own an etiquette academy for youth. My income allows me the leisure to create and sell fine arts pieces occasionally. I am always looking to learn something new: from something as small as a historical fact to a new skill (instrument, video tech & sound boards, interior decorating, make-up artist, tactile arts, photography, dance, create my own fragrance, architecture, etc., foreign language). I work with major resort companies in issuing vacations for hard-working single parents and their families. I volunteer and meet with the organization I donate to each year to ensure the moneys are being used properly. I also volunteer with a huge international non-profit organization once a year. My appreciation for language and culture allows me to actively network with school officials internationally to promote healthy collaborations between families, businesses and under-funded schools. I’m one of the contributors to annual events regarding strengthening and maintaining the partnership between parents and schools regarding taking an active role in their teens’ academic success. I am invited by many radio hosts to engage in the latest news regarding a child, school or progress of our nation’s schools and children. My curriculum and effective communication program is currently run in public and private schools. We meet regularly to celebrate holidays, birthdays and good old family gatherings.

  15. reading all of these inspired me to post my own..

    i am living with my husband in Washington D.C. after we spent a couple of years living in California. i balance my time between my urban modern home, the office, and leisure traveling. much of my daytime work hours are spent designing and running my graphics company moderna images, reputable for our clean work and client focus. i also am CCO for Freeline Music Group, overseeing design and marketing both internally and for music business clients. i rehearse with my dance company and children’s groups many weeknights, and on weekends often spend time at the community program i started teaching dance, its history and its communicative powers to varied groups. a few times a year i lecture on communication and wellness with a focus on healthy modes of expressing sexuality — i empower marginalized women with the power and knowledge to connect and express creatively. throughout my work however, my family comes first and i include them in both learning and educating: bringing my kids to rehearsal and my husband to either watch or guest lecture in athletics, involvement, etc. i am fluent in Spanish and Portuguese and hope to learn another language. physically, i am very active as i encourage the girls i work with to be. i workout 5x a week at least and visit the doctor regularly. i use time to meditate on my goals and connect with God and the God within. i have very close relationships with my family and friends, with a husband who is my best friend, honest and hardworking — we keep our relationship genuinely happy and intimate. i make sure to create time for us to hang out both alone and with our loved ones, whether we are traveling or hosting a small movie night. i seek balance in everything, am reliable and responsible but still creative and impulsive. i love life.

    • I see you have a beautiful life ahead of you, Vogue! I enjoyed reading your narrative and I wish you the best on your journey :)

  16. Although I have the financial flexibility and professional network to live and work anywhere, I choose to use my assets to positively affect my hometown. I live in a four bedroom home with large picturesque windows and open floor plans. I own several businesses here and residential properties throughout the United States. I earn a living by doing what I love, helping people in need to attain resources for a better life. I spend half of my days managing a non-profit organization that provides a variety of services (personal development workshops, after-school recreation, mentoring, housing assistance, job placement, etc.) to the community at no cost. I spend the other half of the day taking care of my family. I have healthy relationships with my family and friends whom I communicate and fellowship with often. It’s important to me to create joy filled memories, so I make an effort to celebrate good news with my loved ones. I don’t want negative situations to be the only uniting factor. Being fiscally advantageous and responsible with my profits has allowed me to travel the world and vacation twice yearly. I spend my leisure time exercising and reading, staying abreast of current events and volunteering. I also take dance and art classes.

    http://silverliningchronicles.wordpress.com/2011/01/14/day-seven-ideal-life-narrative/

    • You have a powerful narrative! We share the desire to use our wealth (claiming in advance) and knowledge to stimulate positive change in our hometown.

  17. Too often I think, “I will…..” or “One day I should….”. So, this has been a good exercise in viewing the possibilities as my current reality.

    I just returned from another research trip to India, Ethiopia, and Abu Dhabi. I live in the city where I’m finishing my doctoral research on international education reform. I’m also teaching at the University (to earn the free part of my degree…lol) and working with a third grade class at Morningside Heights Elementary. I enjoy teaching teachers how to connect their students with other kids around the world in conversations and cultural comparisons. My work is especially rewarding because it gives me the flexibility to support my husband’s ventures and my own passions. I love to entertain, and we have themed get-togethers at our loft once a month. I am completely debt free. I have a healthy emergency fund. And, I contribute to my Roth IRA at the maximum level annually. I treat myself the way I want others to treat me…like a princess. So I always make time for my standing spa date, yoga+pilates, girl’s night, and gourmet club dinners. I am conscious of the way I treat God’s earth, so you know I’m “Green and Chic!” My walk with God is real. It’s transparent, organic, and thriving. I’m following my man as he follows Christ, and let me tell you, it’s a wild ride. I teach a 5-6 year old Sunday School class and work with the Ladie’s Club at Morningside. Service feeds my soul. My relationship with my parents is strong, and I am careful to sow seeds into my father’s church and into my sisters’ and brother’s dreams. I am unreasonably good to myself, my love, my family, my friends, and my enemies. I have a seamless balance between work and play that inspires my younger counterparts. I could keep updating you on my life, but it’s time to make a move. Until next time…

  18. I am living in my condo in a major American city(not sure which one yet) that has a little patio space for entertaining. I live in a neighborhood where something is always happening. I meet up with my artsy friends and we visit museums, galleries and go to see local bands play. I make art that encourages black women to love themselves and look within. I do dozens of commissions yearly and I exhibit all over the country. I maintain an art blog where I interview local and international artists and give my take on the art world and local art scene.I have a BA in fine art and graphic design and I sometimes do freelance work for other companies as a side hustle. I also continue my education through independent courses and online classes. I take dance classes to stay in shape and vocal, guitar and piano lessons to explore other ways to feed my creativity. My debts are paid off. Twice a year I visit my parents and siblings in New York and every other year me, hubby and the kids, take a trip overseas .I am very careful with my health. I get plenty of sleep and exercise regularly and I eat clean. Me and my hubby are madly in love and he knows that I have his back. He’s proud of the work that I’m doing. We have a strong friendship and we’re very supportive of each others endeavors. We make sure to have regular alone time together at least 3 nights a week and each month we have a date night and the kids spend the night out. My kids are compassionate, well rounded individuals and I create opportunities for them to express their talents. I take the time to ask my Creator for His guidance and consider His word daily. I do regular volunteer work and help others to improve their lives and reach their goals.

  19. I am very excited right now about resetting my life. this exercise puts a lot of things into prespective. And it’s easier than i ever imagined it could be.

  22. This was kind of awkward because I’m envisioning my life BEYOND the Ph.D. but I want a lot of these things BEFORE I finish school, which is less than realistic. Unless I marry rich, which isn’t exactly a goal of mine. *SIGH*

    http://www.amandamichellejones.com/?p=649

    As you’ll see, I tweaked a few things from my life map (e.g. why the HELL did I set my ideal income at just $50K? I mean, that’s what I *should* have been making a few years ago, not something I should aspire to in my ideal life!)

  23. Pingback: Reset Your Life Day 30: Make 10 Personal Commitments | Happy Black Woman | Personal Development for Success in Life, Love & Business

  24. Pingback: Reset Your Life Day 12: Create a Vision Board | Happy Black Woman | Personal Development for Success in Life, Love & Business

  25. I am currently living in Paris with my Yorkshire Terrier Dolce. I also own a brownstone in Brooklyn, NY where I operate my Not For Profit organization for pre-teen girls interested in developing careers within the Fashion/Art industries. In Paris I am a consultant to many established and emerging designers, photographers and other creative movers and shakers. In some cases I am simply the muse. I travel frequently throughout the year to visit family and friends and do work for my church, which I am very active in. I take classes regularly in design, cooking, and Philosophy to feed my need for knowledge and creating. I have a multi million-dollar income that I give at least 10% back to God for all of his love and the blessings he continues to give to me; and I am DEBT FREE!

  27. I am living in South Florida in this beautiful 4 bedroom house with a breathe taken view and a big yard; with my handsome, loving husband, beautiful kids and Chase our black lab mix. I run a successful multi-million dollar event planning company. I love my job as it allows me to travel and take full advantage of my creativity. My husband also has his own successful business venture. Our jobs are demanding but we always find time to take family vacations once a year. Me and the hubby also take weekend getaways twice a year to keep our love alive and full of romance. When we aren’t traveling or working we love to entertain our family and friends, while the kids have their own play dates. We are an active family that enjoy fun activities that allows us to stay fit. We eat healthy on a regular basis. Both my husband and I are great cooks. Everyday we learn something new to keep us growing mentally and spiritually.

  29. I am living in my penthouse in Washington, DC with my loving husband, two beautiful children, and family dog. After building a very lucrative career in federal government, I decided to put my PhD and various certifications to use by educating our future leaders as a professor at Georgetown University. After a long day of lectures, I usually speak with clients/vendors planning events for my English/Spanish speaking clientele. By speaking fluent Spanish as a second language, it opens my world/network to various people. While I am in town, I love to plan gatherings/dinner parties for our fiends. My husband and I are very involved in the community through volunteering and regular donations at local charities. We are also teaching our children the importance of service and valuing hard work by taking them with us.

    Since I live such a fast paced life, its important that I stay healthy so I exercise regularly and have a clean diet. On Sundays, I REST. My family and I attend regular church service and we enjoy a day reserved just for family. No business calls…no work…just us. I talk to my parents and my in-laws daily, but its imperative that the kids do as well and we visit them at least 3x a year. My life is busy, but I am extremely blessed.

    With God as the head of our household, we can do ANYTHING we set out to accomplish :)

  30. I finally finished the life map and narrative last week. I now understand why everyone enjoyed these activities the most!!! After completing Day 6 and 7, I thought I should have done them much sooner :) My narrative is a bit long but the major highlights are:

    I am living in NYC with my husband and 2 children. We’re contemplating having a third child for the kids to torture (just kidding) and also moving back to DC so I can be closer to my parents.

    I am writer and organizational/leadership consultant. In addition, I teach intro-level writing and OD courses at a local university. The flexibility gives me time to be with my family and pursue creative interest w/o feeling as if I’m pulled in a million diretions. Plus, i can scale back in any of these pursuits for the newest addition.

    Having a flexible work schedule also allows me ample time for self-care. I have to be diligent about it but I’m able to maintain my workout routine (supplemented by all the city walking), nights out with my girls, and pampering days. My little girl comes with me at times. Its great to show her how to take time and care for yourself. I want her to learn that at a young age.

    My husband and I are best friends but have lives outside of each other. He’ll take me to basketball games and I bring him with me to book fairs. Its nice to share in each others interests but still have time to ourselves. We’re planning a big trip to Italy. We travel abroad every year…just the two of us. We love the kids but this is OUR time.

    ***I’ve been telling my friends about this exercise. I think everyone should do it! Seeing the my life on paper make it easier to pursue necessary actions for it to be real!***

  31. I live abroad in Europe currently (before we head off to live in Italy for 2 years), working on my second Doctoral thesis while teaching classical and modern literature at Cambridge University. My husband is a decorated FBI agent and my children are excelling academically and socially and absolutely love our travels.

    As well as spending time on my studies, I have collaborated with a number of teachers and professors across the globe to teach reading and language skills to people who would have otherwise not had the opportunity to learn something as basic as writing their names. Additionally, I have acquired fluency in three more languages!
    As a result of my work and studies, I am the recipient for several grants and am paid to speak and train private and public ventures in addition to my regular salary from the private foundation that employs me to travel and teach.

    I am back in my pre-work stress clothes and looking better than before I let my last job get to me. I’ve gained some lean muscle tone and have the perkiest you-know-what’s ever!

    My family is well mended and everyone is doing fabulously, living up to their full potential and really enjoying each other’s company. All of the old stuff from the past has been killed, buried and long fogotten and all that is left is genuine love for one another. It’s so terrific to see everyone living just as my grandparents had envisioned and prayed for. Everyone happily visits for the holidays and no one wants to see anyone go home.

    Another incredible thing is happening, too! My former best friend and I are meeting for dinner tonight to catch up and reconnect. She and I have forgiven each other’s shortcomings and are on a fresh track. It’s fantastic. Funny thing is that she finally accepted my brother-in-law’s proposal and they’ll be married in a few short months and many of the people we know mutually, will be there. It really can be a small world, sometimes! I have six dinner parties scheduled over the next month and a half with some very close friends that are flying in from Germany, Liberia and New York. Life is beyond good…it’s great.

  32. Please forgive me… I am so behind with the Reset Your Life challenge. I wasn’t sure what time frame to set this in. Here’s my ideal life:

    I own a loft in a trendy downtown section of a major city (I haven’t narrowed down where I want to live yet). My loft is huge and there is adequate space for living, entertaining and my office overlooks the city skyline. I have my own styling agency, Style Therapy by Kim. I work as a fashion stylist, and personal shopper. I help people learn how to dress, shop, and I create new outfits from what they have hanging in their closets already. I also do public speaking at workshops and freelance writing for fashion and lifestyle publications. As much as I love my work, I can’t help the nagging feeling that I should get started on the books I have always dreamed of writing. I have two book ideas, a romance novel and a style guide catering to real women.

    My work involves all the things I love. I am living my dream and making very good money. I have a nice amount of clients who constantly refer me to their friends and colleagues. My customer service and attention to detail skills are what people rave about. My clients say that I have the ability to put them at ease and my talent for making them look good has boosted their confidence tremendously.

    I have a small close knit group of friends who I have known for years. All the negative, drama filled people have been cut loose. My mom and I are still very close. She is so happy that I am doing what I love. She plans to visit me for her birthday. I am excited to spend time with her and show her around. I really love this no name city that I live in (ha, ha!)

    I am engaged to be married. My fiance is a wonderful man who is incredibly talented, hardworking, loving, spiritual, and supportive. He’s incredibly good looking too. I love him so much & he is head over heels in love with me. Our wedding will be a very low key affair, just our closest friends and families, followed by a dinner party reception. We will honeymoon in St. Lucia.

    I envision our life will be filled with excitement, love, and travel. We are on the same page about starting a family, our spiritual life, and making sure we give back because we know that we are truly blessed. The only issue we have is where we will live. I like downtown city life and he wants a more traditional suburban lifestyle. We agreed to live in the loft for two years. Hopefully I can woo him to staying downtown ;-)

  33. Hey people..late again…here’s my Narative

    My fashion design business is thriving,now employee 10 people, i rarely sew now but still active in the creative process coming up with new designs and patterns. I run an Non profit organisation helping women build their self esteem and work towards financial independence.

    I live with my husband in beautiful bungalow (which we own) He is handsome,loving,hardworking attentive supportive and God fearing..we are each others best friend. We travel twice a year to holiday destinations of our choice. I got to finally visit the Basilica in ITALY amazing Architecture!!:-). This year it will be Paris, one of the fashion capitals of the world. We have two amazing,loving well adjusted children a boy and a girl..our domestic life is bliss am not complaining.

    My husband finished his MBA and now earning a six figure income, i completed my Post Graduate diploma in business and now make smarter business decisions…proud of our joint savings account..a tidy sum :-)

    I am at my ideal weight goal maintaining it with exercise..encouraging my husband too i see progress. Am at a good place with my family and friends they reach out too, which creates a balance….

  34. Pingback: Reset Your Life Day 9: Do One Thing | Happy Black Woman | Personal Development for Success in Life, Love & Business

  35. Still working on my narrative..wow all ladies narratives are vivid!! from your thoughts/keyboard to Gods ears

  36. Re-reading everyone’s comments…so feeling the detail of each narrative! The peace that comes from each one makes me want to know more. Think I’m warming up to this exercise! lol

  37. I wasn’t sure what timeframe to set my narrative in, so I opted for sometime in the next 2 years, giving me some time to get there as well as some time to change in the future.
    +++++++

    I’m living and working in San Francisco, with a busy and fulfilling job as an event planner. I currently work for a large tech firm, but I’m back in school getting my MBA in order to run my own successful event planning business. I make good money and have a balanced budget, allowing me to live the lifestyle I’ve always wanted without drifting into excess. I have tons of friends throughout the city, who I entertain in my well-decorated, spacious SoMa apartment. I have weekly cocktail nights with friends, where we explore various San Francisco neighborhoods, trying out all the best bars. I have a significant other, a wonderful man that I respect and admire, who treats me well and supports me in all that I do. I read voraciously – at least 40 books a year – and I take time to write each day. My blog is well-read and respected as a collection of anecdotes and humorous stories that 20-something women can relate to. I travel back to Long Island and New York City frequently, leaving plenty of time to see my family and friends on the East Coast. In my spare time, I volunteer teaching sex education across the city and informing people about the rewards of a safe, open sex life. I work out on a regular basis – keeping my body firm and toned. I make sure to eat right, cooking myself healthy meals in my fully-stocked kitchen. At least twice a year, I take a trip to an exotic locale, where I can learn about the culture of the people who live there.

  38. Hey! Ended up behind, but managed to finish my Day 7 Assignment today! If I’m lucky, maybe I’ll get Day 8 done–we’ll see! In the meantime, here’s the link to my blog where I posted my narrative: http://j.mp/gR8Uu2, and the actual narrative below:

    In my ideal life…I own a duplex that I share with my life partner. I don’t know yet where we live, but know that we are happy, and enjoy each other’s company immensely. Our dwelling has no critters (save a cat and some fish), and is well-maintained, with energy-efficient appliances.

    I spend my days actively taking care of myself. I cook for my partner and myself, and take care of my kids as needed (if I have any). I do work to bring income into my home as a college professor, and workshop leader with Gilbert Educational Ministries, my consulting firm. I work about 6 hours a day, and only on projects that genuinely speak to my talents and passions. My weekends are for recreation with my family; I do NOT. WORK. on SUNDAYS. To elaborate more on work: I am a community educator by vocation, and I love what I do. I speak for a lot of different groups, and provide comprehensive sex education for a number of private groups and organizations, including the Steve & Marjorie Harvey Mentoring Weekends. I also do a nationally-syndicated advice column and radio podcast called Ms. Tracie Speaks; it’s listened to by millions of people weekly, and people appear to be genuinely blessed by it.

    I completed my doctorate in Human Sexuality education in 2014; additionally, I’ve learned French, and have resumed studies in Spanish & Kiswahili. I use my languages frequently–with clients, audiences abroad and friends. I’ve also learned to sing and play piano, and sing in different languages as well.

    Economically, I am SOLID, as I earn a seven-figure income, and do very well with investing that in projects that increase my net worth. I do not lend money to others, but gift according to my abundance and values. As far as spending goes, I do what I want, when I want, and never have to worry about making ends meet, as my funds are well accounted for. My credit score is somewhere between 750 and 800, but I don’t use credit unless I absolutely need it.

    I am the EPITOME of health and vitality! I workout EVERYDAY, using a variety of techniques, including walking, yoga, line-dancing, skiing, etc. I eat whole foods, and never deal with fast-food options unless it is absolutely necessary (in which case I stick to salads with no dressing). Life is–physically speaking–a party for me, and I live every minute of it to the fullest.

    I have wonderful relationships with my family and friends, and balance the amount of energy I give to them with what is given me. I have joy, and am happy, which is most important. :o )

    Sorry–I got kinda long-winded, but…here it is! :o )

  40. I loved this assignment:-)

    I am living in a brownstone (which I own) in Brooklyn’s Clinton Hill with my two kids.
    They kids are at school and I am headed to my office located in Park Slope to meet with my editorial staff to put the finishing touches on my magazine geared towards African-American girls in grades 8-12. Once I am done with this meeting I will be meeting with my Board of Directors for my girls mentoring organization to put the finishing touches on our annual scholarship fund-raiser.
    I have my PhD. in Education policy and I’m the chairperson for a Charter School in Brooklyn with a 100% graduation rate. I also sit on several committees working on improving the Education of our children in the New York City area.
    My summers are spent taking weekend trips with my kids and I spend the month of August in California with my Mother who has relocated their and opened a Bed and Breakfast which we co-own.
    I am proud to say that I have zero debt and my kids College fund is growing everyday and they should not have to take out any student loans!
    I am at peace in knowing that Jesus is my best friend and together there is nothing we can’t do!
    My “little light” is definitely shining!

  42. *Sorry a day behind* Here is my narrative:

    “I and my kids are living comfortably in a beautiful home I just purchased. I have invited my family (immediate&extended) to spend the holidays with us. I can’t wait till we all are together sharing pictures and stories. It’s important that my kids know their family history. I have finally released ALL baggage from my past and am dating a wonderful man which I truly believe he and I are equally yoked. We have date night twice a month to keep that spark alive. My friends and I also have a potluck dinner twice a month to have much needed girl talk. I have started an exercise regimen(working out 3x a week) and I have never felt better. I’m eating right and keeping on point with all of my checkups. I have started my grant writing and will soon be opening the doors of my non-profit. My “tween” program is also doing exceptionally well. I finally have the career that I want and am taking courses to continue my education and also gain more licensure in my field. The kids and I travel frequently which has become so much easier now that I have a dedicated travel fund that is separate from the rest of my savings.”

  43. I am living outside of the District of Columbia in Rockville, MD with my husband, our son, and a new baby. I am the Principal at a D.C. Public School and we are doing well. We own a beautiful single family home. I wake up every morning at five to meditate, pray, and reflect on what I must do for the day. My marriage has never been stronger. My husband and I make sure our family is home together each night to have dinner together. We also commit to going out once a week to ensure we have “us” time. I speak with my distant family once a week and we make a trip to New York to see them twice a year. Our children always go a third time for two weeks in the summer. My husband I use the time our children are away to go on a romantic vacation. Every spring we also take a family vacation. The only rules of family vacations are the kids pick and we can never go to the same place twice. I am the healthiest I have ever been, I have been in remission for cancer for years. I maintain an amazing diet and I commit to seeing my therapist regularly. She keeps me grounded and on the right track. We are financially stable and have NO DEBT!!! We maintain a fund for our children’s education, for vacations, and for emergencies. I have my Ph.D in Education Public Policy and am working on several education reform projects in the District. I am an advocate for education equality. We have a maid that comes in once a week to help keep our home in order. We are a strong family. We have dinner every Sunday with my mother in law, my brother in laws, and my stepson. Life is GOOD and I am truly at peace with the things are.

  45. Loved this exercise. I never sat and actually pictured how I wanted my life to look in the future and by completing this it made me see the reality in where my life is headed if I stay in tune with the path I have chosen. My narrative is below:

    I am living in a suburb near a large, metropolitan city. My home is 5 bedrooms and houses my husband and our 3 kids. We have two dogs and a yard large enough for the family to roam around and enjoy the outdoors without having to go too far. My children attend private school and both my husband and I are involved in their academic and personal development.

    I work in the city as a Senior Public Relations Specialist but also maintain my own consultancy from home. I am always on the go attending networking events and PR functions but plan my time in such a way that I am able to take time off to travel to a new country at least once a year with my husband, friends, or other family members. I am very active in my community and my family attends church every Sunday. I am an active member in my sorority and bounce around between being on the membership committee and the committee in charge of our youth affiliates. My children are, of course, either Sigma Betas (my sons) or Archonettes/Amicettes (my daughters). Every year, my husband and I take a week or two off from work to have a family vacation during the summer when school is out.

    Together, my husband and I make around $250,000 a year from our successful careers. I work out regularly with girlfriends in my neighborhood and we get together at least once a week to meet for girl talk and work on maintaining a life long friendship with each other. I purchased a separate home for my mother and she visits my home at least 4 times a week to spend time with me and her grandkids.

    My husband and I work daily on our marriage and commit at least 2 hours a day to “our time” where we are free from any outside distraction. We communicate regularly throughout the day either by phone, text, or social media just to check-in and still do special things for each other “just because.” Our marriage, although not cookie-cutter perfect, makes us both happy and we both understand that we will always be best friends first and “family partners” second.

    Although we are wealthy, we do not spend on unnecessary things. We save and invest every chance that we get for our children’s future, the likelihood that one of us can no longer work, and for our retirement. Our mortgage does not overwhelm us and we have gotten this way through calculated steps and sacrifices we had to make in our past. Overall, my family and I are in a happy place and work diligently to maintain that happiness.

    • I really liked your narrative! It focused on not only you but your family which is a HUGE deal for me. My narrative took a similar path.

    • I really enjoyed reading this. It was awesome to see the progression of your story!

    • Love this!!! It’s like you wrote exactly what I couldn’t articulate in mine. Excellent narrative!

  46. Currently I live in a suburb of New York with my husband (a.k.a Booski) and dog child, Mason the Chihuahua. I travel into Manhattan everyday where I work as an event planner. I plan corporate events, anniversaries, birthday parties and fund raising events. My side hustle is photography; I focus on landscape and cityscape photography. The income that I receive from my photography is set aside in savings. No worries, Booski also contributes to the nest egg. This allows us to take a wonderful yearly vacation and lots of little getaways just for exploration sake. On my very limited down time, I will sometimes hang out with my crafty, creative and nerdy friends to get in some good ole fun, book club discussions and fellowship. Since Booski has a creative job as well, we are often invited to fabulous events a couple of times a year. To keep in shape, I work out at least 3 days a week, have my yearly examinations, stay away from fast food and visit the dentist regularly. We see our families on a daily basis because we live very close to one another. We have barbeques and annual Thanksgiving and Christmas get togethers. We also see each other at Church on occasion as Booski and I are early service people because we are a Sunday afternoon sports couple (guilty). Journaling is one of my favorite pastimes; it helps to clear my mind of everything. I do not begin my day without thanking God for life and blessings and I meditate to get my mind right before entering the World.

  47. I just finished my narrative and as I was writing I would stop and visualize it and I truly can see it happening. This was a fun exercise and I may be revising my narrative as I continue to grow.

  49. I really got motivated and excited writing/reading my ideal life narrative…here you go.

    Ideal Life Narrative –
    I live in a custom built house with my God-given husband. My husband is a man who loves, cherishes, respects and supports the woman I am and desire to become. I wake up with a beautiful smile, thanking God for another day full of his blessings. And then I begin my day. I am a chief technical officer at an engineering firm. I go into the office to review/prepare briefs/demonstrations of software applications in development/production. I meet with engineers to discuss future opportunities and brainstorm design/requirements for current software applications. I leave work and meet my hubby for dinner and sometimes an event – usually a science/art exhibit, jazz event, etc. I speak to middle-school age girls about getting into the fields of science and technology periodically through the year. I sit on discussion panels – taking out time to really discuss women issues and potential solutions. I actively serve along with my friends as mentors to elementary school age children, encouraging them to excel in math and reading. I work with other family members to plan our reunion trips and utilize the latest technologies to keep up with the latest goings & comings of my extended family. I take pleasure-filled trips with my hubby throughout the year…we are in the process of picking what place to visit next. I attend various events hosted by my friends in support of their endeavors. I work out at the gym regularly and I defined what a balanced diet was for me and am currently enjoying it. I keep a journal of each day’s “roses”. I read a book each month – it may be faith-based, career-related, food for thought, or some fiction to stimulate my imagination. And before I go to bed, I spend time in prayer and study with God.

  51. My Ideal Life Narrative

    I am self employed doing what I enjoy and I have more freedom and opportunity to travel. I attend seminars and take classes both for work and general interest. I meet many people this way and have made many advantageous contacts for my work and have greatly expanded my social circle. My husband and I are better able to get away for jazz concerts in fabulous locations or to simply visit our mountain hideaway. I am available to spend significantly more time with my immediate family – for better or worse :) . My extended family is now closer and we get together much more often. I am getting to know each of them better and I genuinely enjoy them. It truly is a good thing to know your people. My overall health is excellent, I have no debt, and I am building a nice nest egg of my own.

    I feel really peaceful after completing this exercise. I have to pin some things down but this is what I want.

    Thank you!

  52. Time for a check-in! I finally received my 2nd Master’s degree. The first one, a M.A. in Mental Health Counseling really came in handy at the practice I worked for. However, I decided that I really wanted to start my own practice (specializing in family and marriage counseling for Black families in hopes to help rebuild the familial unit) and decided to get my 2nd M.A. in Marriage and Family Therapy. My husband’s MBA really came in handy with starting my practice and I am beyond thrilled at the success that we’ve experienced in our careers. More than that, I am honored to have someone that reminds me of God’s love for His bride. Someone that God made just for me. Someone that loves me beyond any doubt my mind could envisage. Someone that will love, adore, protect, and honor his family until his final day on earth. We have amazing children that remind us daily why Jesus sacrificed His life for us. We just returned home from our Annual Family Vacation. This year we decided to just stay stateside and spent the week at a Bed and Breakfast in Savannah, GA. We are already saving and preparing for our trip to Aruba next summer and we can’t wait. We are also looking forward to our Mission Trip with our church family. It feels amazing to be able to give our resources to those who haven’t been blessed in the manner that we have. Stewardship has always been a big lesson in our home, so we are sure to give back and bless someone, as God continues to bless us.

    Oh, hold on…Our puppy is barking his head off!

    Because my narrative is so long, I won’t post it in its entirety. Check my blog for the rest: http://keikokaveri.tumblr.com/post/2136345540

  53. Hola Ladies,
    Here is my narrative:
    I own a townhome in _______.I live with my daughter, Ava, and my supportive, honest, faithful and romantic Alpha Phi Alpha member husband. We do monthly activities as a family. I attend monthly get to together with my friends and sorors. I am a member of ___ ___ ___ graduate chapter of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc.. I work in a career that I love where I make over 40,000 a year with full benefits. This career allows me to drop Ava off to school, be home when Ava gets from school, attend all her school functions and to do the majority of household duties. As a side hustle I am a personal organizer and blogger. I attend Mass every Sunday and am a member or the Church’s women group. I speak German fluently and vacation there every summer for a month. I am the CEO of the nonprofit organization: Teen Mothers ExceLLing. I celebrate holidays with my family and my husband’s family. I am a member of a gym where I work out 3 days a week. I eat and serve my family 95% Organic foods. I maintain a healthy weight. I am not easily stressed or angered by others nor sudden changes or setbacks. I am debt free and with a great credit score. I have savings accounts for Ava and myself. I save money from each paycheck. My savings account consists of an eight month rainy day fund. Also, I have money saved to travel at leisure. I save money by clipping coupons and adhering to a budget. I enjoy reading and yoga. I attend conferences that intrigue me. I have faith in God and follow my intuition.

    The ______s are because I have no idea where I want to live. My location indicates what graduate chapter I join. so no location no name of grad chapter. I LOVED this exercise. It was exciting and refreshing.

    • Shermaine, I love your narrative! You covered all the bases and I can totally envision you living this life by all the details you included…almost like a movie. I wish you every success in achieving your ideal life!

      • Aww Thanks. This challenge is great. I was depressed about my current situation and was having a hard time finding a bright side nor could I envision a good future. Your exercise helped me soooo much. I pinpointed the areas I needed to work on and now I have a picture of how I want my life to look. Plus I feel that I CAN achieve all of my goals.

    • Woot woot! That’s my Maine! I totally see you living that life. You forgot to mention that you drop Ava off with her G-Ma one weekend a month. And that we have lunch once a week. Go us!

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