We Fear Things That Cannot Hurt Us

“Whatever you fear most has no power – it is your fear that has the power.” – Oprah Winfrey

I experience the feeling of fear about a lot of things in my life.

I’m afraid that my business will “fail.” More specifically, I fear that one of these days, no one will want to hire me to do anything anymore.

I’m afraid every time I step onto a stage to give a speech or teach a workshop. I fear that the people in the audience will see how young I am and think I have nothing to offer them.

I’m afraid of getting into a romantic relationship because there’s the possibility that it’s not going to “work.” Many times, I fear revealing my true feelings because I want to avoid being rejected or having to reject someone else.

I’m afraid that I’ll always be in debt, never pay off my student loans and my credit score will never be “good.” This fear often links up with the first one about my business failing.

I’m afraid that my sister will never speak to me again. Ultimately, I fear that we will never be able to overcome our past issues and relate to each other in a healthy way.

Whew! And that’s just a little peek into my lizard brain.

But do you know what ALL of these fears have in common? 

Even if any of these things actually did happen, I would not die.

Even if my business failed, my credit score never got above “fair” and I never got into another romantic relationship for the rest of my life…I would still be here.

Even if I had to pay my student loans until I’m 68 and my sister never called me again…I would still be ALIVE.

I would still be able to go outside and feel the warmth of the sun on my face.

When you think about your fears that way, it feels kind of silly to worry too much about them. Doesn’t it?

This morning, I woke up thinking about something the presenter said at the speaker’s workshop I attended last weekend. As soon as I heard it, the reality of how we live our lives began to sink in.

We fear things that cannot hurt us.

But today is a good day to remember that we don’t have to.

Take Action and Reflect:

  1. Make a list of all the things you are most afraid of.
  2. For each fear on your list, ask yourself: “If this actually happened, would I die?” Write down your answer YES or NO next to each fear.

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