I’ve been thinkin’ ’bout you
Do you think about me still?
Do ya, do ya?
- Frank Ocean, “Thinkin Bout You”
Early tomorrow morning, I’ll be taking a red-eye flight to Minnesota. No, I’m not traveling for a speaking engagement.
I’m flying to Minneapolis for a date.
A date with a guy I used to talk to years ago. When we met – due to a number of reasons – Â the timing was all wrong for us to be able to build a meaningful romantic relationship. I don’t even remember why, exactly, I “kicked him to the curb” (his words, not mine). What I do remember is that he was a great guy, maybe so much so that back then, I convinced myself I didn’t deserve someone like him.
(Have you ever talked yourself OUT of dating a good man? Yep. That was me.)
Back in July, he had emailed me. I’m pretty sure we hadn’t talked in three years.
“I was thinking of you today so I thought I would reach out and say hello. I hope you are well and thought it would be great to get together if you are interested soon.”
I didn’t know if I was interested. I wrote him back, distracted. I had just started dating the Pianist and I was knee-deep in planning my trip to Europe. But when I came back, his email was still in my inbox. And his memory was still tugging at my heart.
Since September, I’d thought about writing him back so many times. I wanted to tell him yes. I was interested.
So last week, I finally did. He replied that it would be nice to see me. We talked on the phone and his voice still held the same soothing tone I remembered. He said he was really busy with work travel, but since he was going to Minneapolis the following week, would I like to come and visit?
I thought he was joking, so I played along.
“Sure,” I said.
It wasn’t until he bought the plane ticket and sent me the confirmation email for the flight that it sunk in.
I’m going to Minneapolis for a date with a man I haven’t seen in three years.
Last week, I had no plans to travel anywhere else until December to spend time with my family in Florida. This week, I’m flying to another city to visit someone that I never thought would want to see me again.
I guess you could say that the biggest lesson I’ve learned this week is that sometimes “the one who got away” comes back around.
You never know who still has a candle lit for you.
For us, perhaps the timing will still be wrong. It’s quite possible that we were never compatible in the first place. Or maybe it will just be a fun adventure to add to our mental rolodex of memories. But we won’t know anything until I get to Minneapolis, until I step off the plane and look into his eyes.
Or do you not think so far ahead?Â
Cause I been thinkin’ ’bout forever
Have you ever had an old flame come back into your life unexpectedly? Did you pursue a new relationship with them or let it stay in the past?
happyblackwoman
happyblackwoman
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happyblackwoman
I say have fun! It is not often that we get to go back and revisit and old flame. I look forward to the update!
Read my latest blog post…Happy Thanksgiving 2012
This is why I love dating. It is such an adventure. Enjoy the journey!!!
Great post. I can’t think of anyone from my past that I’d want to rekindle anything with.
Have a great time on your date. Will you provide us with an update? Pretty please…
I recently got back in touch with a guy I had a fling with my senior year in high school. I hadn’t seen him since a NYE’s party in 2002, but our 10 yr reunion brought us together. The chemistry was instant and we’ve been hanging out ever since. I can definitely say time and life experiences have matured him and it’s pretty awesome to see. It was extremely unexpected, but I guess that’s how life works huh?
I so enjoyed this post! I hope you have a fantastic time re-engaging and exploring whether you two are a better ‘fit’ for each other this time around. Personally, I’ve decided not to rekindle anything with any men from my past. Been there, done that, too many times so at this point in life I am looking for the new. However,I will admit I do find it totally flattering when I discover one of my old flames still has a spark for me! (smile)
Enjoy your date and Minneapolis – it’s a wonderful city.
Read my latest blog post…The General Knew Better
I definitely have most men in my past on a “don’t go there ever again” list but it’s because I know were never good for each other. With this guy, I still don’t know. And yes, I was totally flattered, too! But I think my curiosity is what’s mostly leading me to MN.
Curiousity is a beautiful thing. Especially when one has the courage to actually follow those thoughts that say to us, “What if?”
Read my latest blog post…The General Knew Better
Rosetta, I’m there right now! My best friend’s cousin and I had “secret” crushes on each other in our teens and is now back in my life 35 years later. It’s been amazing! I finally reached out to him after my friend would tell me, year after year: “Girl, that man is still in love with you!” We click more now probably than we would have then (I guess age and experience will do that). We’re also in different states but are both looking forward to seeing each other again very soon. I hope you have a wonderful time and I can’t wait to hear the deets!
Aww, I love that story! So amazing that after 35 years, you both still maintained that spark. Hope you get to see each other soon
Each moment is new and the dishes although used again have been washed so many times in dishwater and are new once again. Forget the past, Forget the future, deal with what is real: the now. Have a good meeting.
As one of your few (maybe only?) reader in Minneapolis, I hope you enjoy your date in my city!
I have one person who I think of as “the one who got away” but previous experiences keep me from reaching out.
Read my latest blog post…A Year In Locs
I didn’t know I had any readers in MN LOL! Even though I’m not a big fan of malls, I’m actually looking forward to seeing the MOA. It sounds like a fascinating place.