“It’s time for you to move, realizing that the thing you are seeking is also seeking you.” – Iyanla Vanzant
Ever since I got rid of my apartment back in 2011, you could say I’ve been a bit of a nomad, wandering from place to place, home to home. From DC to northern Virginia to Honolulu to Baltimore to Charlottesville to Europe to Richmond, back to northern Virginia with a recent trip to Thailand, this HBW has gotten around over the past two years! Underlying the urge to explore different cities and budget living arrangements was also a big question I had yet to answer.
I went to college in Richmond and have built the majority of my personal and professional relationships here. But I’d been here since 2000. Now pushing 13 years, was my wanderlust a sign that it was time for me to go live somewhere else?
In my Life Mapping Workbook (which you can get for free here), one of the areas I ask you to explore is your lifestyle – where you want to live location-wise, your ideal living situation, etc. Those of you who are on the HBW newsletter (and actually READ it LOL), already know the decision I’ve made for myself in re-doing my own Life Map.
Today, I wanted to share the official announcement with everyone else who hasn’t yet seen the news via my emails or my personal blog…
When I left my job in 2010, I simultaneously started Happy Black Woman as a personal blog to document my journey of going natural and becoming self-employed. Today, it has grown into a supportive online community that encourages women to live their ideal lives. Here, we have positive, affirming conversations about personal development, self-care, relationships, entrepreneurship, lifestyle, travel and what it means to be free. I’ve been surprised and delighted to see how our HBW community has evolved from a teeny tiny blog to a large readership, then expanding to live events and training for women all over the country who are on the same path.
While I was on retreat in Thailand, what I realized is that I want to work with and for YOU on a bigger scale in service to my Personal Mission Statement (you can get this exercise in my full 31 Days to Reset Your Life program or the Kindle ebook version). In the space of just one month, I became present to the truth that I would have to step up once again to become the CEO of me – this time in a new capacity.
First, Decide Where You Really Want to Live
It took living on a tropical island in Asia 10,000 miles from home in a villa with 20 other entrepreneurs to realize that…
I love living on an island. I love being able to take my laptop to the beach. I love that I can write and connect and teach from anywhere in the world.
After I’d been in Koh Tao just a few days, I had a very casual, but life-changing conversation with one of the guys in our Project Getaway group. The concept of the program was to bring together a group of location-independent, tech-savvy business owners to mastermind and learn from each other in a beautiful tropical setting. So we were talking about our travels and homebases and where we wanted to go next. I found myself repeating a familiar refrain:
I have a great life in DC, but I would really love to live in Hawaii. That’s my dream! I lived there as a military brat from 1994-2000 and it’s always been my favorite place in the world.
That’s when it hit me. The little voice of adventure that got me on the plane from DC to Bangkok started asking: well, why the hell CAN’T you go live in Hawaii? Instead of clinging to all the excuses I usually give about it being so expensive (so is the entire DC area) and so far (that’s what airplanes are for), I just allowed myself to imagine the experience of doing something deliciously different with my life.
In that moment of brief conversation, I felt something shift inside me. My heart jumped a small jump of hope that one of my longtime dreams could actually come true this year. Suddenly, I had decided.
I will move to Oahu, Hawaii before the end of 2013.
This year, I will spend my 31st birthday (New Year’s Eve!) on Waikiki Beach, embracing my new life with joy and excitement. My focus will now primarily be on building Happy Black Woman as a supportive online community and training company that empowers women around the world to create their ideal lives through personal development and entrepreneurship.
Then, Figure Out How to Get There
No matter where you might want to move to, you can only get there by taking action, one step at a time. I have a rough six-nine month relocation plan that involves completing my remaining client work here in DC, finding a place to live in Honolulu and securing more business under my desired areas of focus. It’s incredible how being around like-minded, adventurous people helped me open to the possibility of leaving the DC-MD-VA area I’ve called home for the last 13 years to start a new chapter in another part of the country.
I share this part of my plan even as it’s still being scratched out on the proverbial napkin, knowing that right now, you may also be struggling with fear and making the decision to try something new. Maybe what you really needed to hear today is that your dreams are NOT crazy and you deserve to see them come true. This is the year of choosing, after all. This is the year to say yes to your deepest desires.
I believe this is what it means to create your ideal life. To declare exactly what you want to do and figure out how to make it happen. As Seth Godin (one of my favorite writers) wrote recently, it’s easy to work for someone else’s agenda, but it’s much, much harder to prioritize your own.
The problem isn’t that it’s impossible to pick yourself. The problem is that it’s frightening to pick yourself. It’s far easier to put your future into someone else’s hands than it is to slog your way forward, owning the results as you go.
Perhaps it’s time for all of us to stop saying “I can’t because…” and start fully owning the results of the choices we make. For me, that journey begins now.
Have you ever made the decision to start over in a new city/state/country? How did you know it was time for you to take the leap and make the move?
I’d love to hear your experience! Leave a comment below and join the conversation – our HBW Community is becoming a great place to connect with like-minded ladies, ask questions and get support :)
Rosetta Thurman is the Founder of Happy Black Woman. Follow Rosetta on Twitter.
Join thousands of women who have completed the only online course that gives you all the tools you need to get unstuck, set clear goals and rediscover who you truly are. Learn more about the 31 Days to Reset Your Life program here.