“Someone was hurt before you, wronged before you, hungry before you, frightened before you, beaten before you, humiliated before you, raped before you…yet, someone survived…You can do anything you choose to do.” – Maya Angelou
I got a message awhile back from one of my email subscribers who was quite angry after reading one of my emails where I spoke about my core belief – that Black women can do ANYTHING we want with our lives and no one can stop us…but us.
That is my motto, the philosophy behind what I teach and basically how I’ve lived my life for years!
However, this person was mad at the messenger because she felt I was giving “false hope” to women like her – a single mom who was struggling financially.
She said something along the lines of:
SOME people can’t just live that kind of life where we do what we want and travel the world like you.
SOME of us have bills to pay and responsibilities to take care of.
Now this wasn’t the first time I had heard someone express this to me.
For some reason, many of us have this false belief that you have to be bill-free and problem-free and kid-free to be able to live the life you want.
Which couldn’t be further from the truth! If that was the case, then NONE of us would ever get there lol.
My tagline is “Create Your Ideal Life” for a reason – because I believe that no matter what your circumstances are, you can CREATE your own version of happiness, success and freedom.
It might not look like mine or theirs or hers and that’s fine.
It could take you a few extra steps and that’s fine.
You might need more support and that’s fine, too!
The point is that whatever you want to do is POSSIBLE, no matter what your situation is right now.
Of course, you have to do the work, even when you don’t feel like it.
Of course, you have to take consistent action, even when it feels like you don’t know what you’re doing.
Of course, you have keep going, even when you feel discouraged.
Of course, you have to believe in yourself, have FAITH that the life you want is possible for you and never give up!
But if you keep telling yourself, I CAN’T because I’m a single mom, I CAN’T because my family was poor, I CAN’T because I didn’t go to college, I CAN’T because I’m in debt, and so on and so forth, then it will be IMPOSSIBLE for you to manifest what you want.
When you use those disempowering words and phrases, you just reinforce the limiting beliefs and they get stronger and more difficult to transform.
But what if you used different language instead?
What if you started asking yourself…
HOW can I get what I want?
WHAT are the first steps I can take to get to where I want to be?
WHO can I ask for help?
HOW can I manifest the money to invest in my dream?
WHAT action can I take today that will get me closer to my vision?
You stopped dwelling on how HARD it is for you because of X,Y,Z and started learning from those who were in your situation but succeeded ANYWAY?
Although it might feel like it at times, you’re NOT the first single mom who wanted to travel the world.
You’re NOT the first person who came from a poor family who wanted to start a business.
You’re NOT the first woman who was abused who wanted to become a motivational speaker and write a book.
There are many courageous women who have gone before you!
Search for examples of people like you who have done what you want to do.
Google “single mom travels the world” or “poor Black woman who became a millionaire” or “domestic violence survivor writes book.” You get the point!
Choose to be inspired by their journeys instead of beating yourself up about yours.
Decide to be fueled by the stories of those who made it DESPITE their personal, family or financial circumstances.
If you allow yourself to be motivated by their success, you will absolutely be able to do the same thing!
However, it will require you to stop saying “I can’t” and start believing that you CAN.
P.S. Want to be surrounded by a community of ambitious Black women who want it ALL? If so, then I invite you to join me inside my FREE Facebook Group, the Happy Black Woman Tribe.
CLICK HERE TO REQUEST ACCESS TO THE GROUP: http://happyblackwomantribe.com